Monday, December 31, 2007

No matter what happens, I promised myself that I'm going to blog before 2007 walks into history in another 3 hours. Wow, I can't believe that 2008 is coming so soon. It seems only yesterday when I was summarising the events of 2006. And so, I'm going to do the same for 2007 too.

TWO-O-O-SEVEN
Okay this year has been an emotional rollercoaster for me, with all those up and downs, valleys and peaks. I couldn't remember much about what happen during January but when February came, my whole family (including my aunties and grandma) faced the worst crisis following the unexpected demise of my uncle. Luckily time has proven its ability to heal and much of the things have fallen back to their places during the 3rd quarter of the year.

And also Mai left TP in pursuit of arts. It's really a comfort to know that she's doing okay. She's a lot happier there, from what I can see.

In March, I worked at Lehman Brothers for five weeks, earning a wholesome amount of $1,500. The office isn't too bad, save for the fact that certain people there were snobbish. I'm still appalled by how much those people holding a high post earn a year. Mind you, I'm talking about 6 to 7 digits annual pay.

I also became Yiting's Maths Tuition teacher. Hah~

And at the end of April, Year 2 Sem 1 at TP kicked start and Gracecia, Aili, Wilson and Peng Ghee got into the same class as me. What ensued was a whole lot of jokes and fun amidst project work, so much better than the current semester. Was in the same class as Nicholas again after approximately six years and haha, what a coincidence. FYI, we came from CZPS 5/6-4 when we were in P6.

May to August was school and I couldn't remember much of the details. There were conflicts between me and Mdm D. but then its okay because everything is fine now. There was this human-shaped pathway we did for Biochemistry 2 and CSAS report and so on and so forth.

When August neared the end, Joseph joined the family as a 'shy' puppy. Months have passed and he's showing his true colors and hyperactive nature. Alright, he's barking at some stranger at the staircase again.

September came and oh, the significance of holidays. I remembered the class chalet where I played Mahjong from night till dawn, forgoing sleep. Academic results came and it was the most satisfying thus far. Joined DRP where I had to work with Juan's husband and DRP turned out boring until the mice came.

I GOT A PSP TOO. =)

During October, I went Genting. Details on the october post. Class got changed again and it was farewell to Wilson and Aili. How I wished certain things don't change. Then the whole Biomolecular Science cohort got exposed to PBL, where everybody starts to complain about its difficulty. Then Amic came and within the first week, there was group meetings and such.

November was a difficult month where everyone tried to get things done. The PBL presentation went well and our group really did score. Then there was also CCN day where we sold fishes. It wasn't that bad really. Hah.

December spelled term-tests, term-break, AMIC benchwork, X'mas party and some other insignificant stuff. Oh yah (how can I forget), I turned 18 on the 8th. Haven't done any legal stuff such as buying liquor, cigarettes, TOTO/4D or watching a M18 movie.

And so that's my 2007.

Where I need to force myself to withstand irritating people. Where I truly know the significance of team work. Where my doubts towards anything and everything increase dramatically. Where I start wondering the meaning of true friends. Where I start to inspect myself for any bits of personality and/or habits that irritate others. Where I realised some humans have a motive behind every of their actions. Where I wonder about my capacity as a friend. Where I get irritated and disgusted by what people did to hurt others. Where the walls I erected around myself got higher and tougher. Where I stop trusting most of the people.

The last part turns out to be negative, isn't it?

All right, that's all.

I think I shall continue my AMIC discussion next year.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

My mood has been at the pits since yesterday's morning.

Depressed.

Disappointed.

But not angry despite what I may had said.

-I didn't just gram-stain the E.coli but also my lab coat. Mum's good, she managed to bleach the stain till its barely visible.

-There are too many glitches in the AMIC project and it makes me worry for the report. I just hope that nothing major goes wrong from now, even though I have a hunch that it will.

-School is getting complicated, emotion-wise. My social circle widens but the number of people I could trust as friends diminishes. It's bad. I miss my old friends so much that I wanna cry.

-Shortness of breath and tightness in the chest is a bad omen. It's a sign that tells me that I'm more than depressed.

-Certain situations are telling me that I'm not being a good enough family member. I ought to pay my granny a visit soon. Haven't even brought her to Sakae Sushi like I had promised months ago.

- The inferiority complex is kicking in.

-I'm discouraged at how easy things change with the environment. What's heartwarming in the past is now cold to touch. What was beautiful had become ugly. I don't even know if it exist anymore. No one has the courage to bring it up. I guess it's officially gone.

-I reckoned that I need a boyfriend but the right one hasn't enter my life yet. Maybe I have been too careful with my feelings. No, I'm not living in the past.

-Class X'mas party is coming. It's supposed to be a joyous occasion. Yet I'm not looking forward to it. Haven't even buy the present.

~*~

Happy stuffs that happened today:
Fish & Co.*Beautiful pictures*Window Shopping*Delifrance Dessert*Mystery of the Dangling Toilet Paper*Case of the Forgotten Lettuce

All with Mum & Sis.

Afterall, Family is of paramount importance.

(^^)

Friday, December 07, 2007

This is going to be really random and mundane. I'm blogging for the sake of blogging.

It has been almost a month since I last updated my land and whoa, cobwebs are lining all the corners and the dust are building up. Luckily there are no eight-legged freals or dust mites for all that matter.

The past few weeks were a mad rush for presentations and deadlines. Phew, all is TEMPORARILY coming to a standstill. I thought I'm different after all these, perhaps mentally stronger or healthier. Have begun to like some of my classmates when I had previously thought that I'm not going to accept them because of first impressions. Yes, the Homosapiens are more or less first-impression-matters dunces. I'm just one of them.

I guess I'm trying to blind and numb myself to certain things that are happening around me. I'm also trying to curb my growing dislike for certain things and certain people because its bad for my health. Those days before are in past tense and no matter how much I pray, time is not going to reverse for my sake. I don't really like the present tense.

The lecturers are okay and this isn't the first time I declare it but my favorite lecturer is still Kok. He's the shining mascot of peace, tranquility and well, sometimes boredom. By the way, I highly suspect that Dr. Jason Chang memorises our face and names through the register book. That sounds crazy but it looks exactly like what he would do. I don't even have a tut/lab under him and he knows my name. That explains why I couldn't really react when he called me during lecture just now. I shrugged, only to turn and meet Gracecia's death glare.

Chatted with AhLi, Gracecia and Faiz over a couple of seaweed chicken, hashbrowns and jemput pisangs after lesson ended. It had been really the females who did most of the talking. Gracecia said that it's weird if I'm friendly; as in if I'm outwardly passionate about making friends with people. I thought it was true. Outgoing, loud and squeamishness don't fit me AT ALL. I would puke and let all my goosebumps stand if I squeal on a constant basis. The thought of it is making my stomach churn.

I'd decided that I shan't slack today and that I will sleep late just to get a tad of my revision done. See, that's how a procrastinator like me survives when term-test period arrives. My sleeping time decreases but my weight will increase.

I hate irritating people, especially during lectures. People aren't going to think that you know nothing even if you don't speak up.

Okay. That's about a hundredth of what happen during the past month when I wasn't updating.

By the way, today's my last day of being 17. So, please wish me a happy b'dae tomorrow. It's compulsory.

And I'm dead serious.

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Really.